MoMonkey MoMonkey: Don't baby your child

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January 17, 2005

Don't baby your child

As I mentioned in my last post, I am going to comment on the 7 areas that are highlighted in the book I'm currently reading (entitled "The 7 Worst Things (good) Parents do"). I'm reading the chapter on babying your child. Some interesting things...

First, as parents we tend to do one of two things: Do what was done to us or do the opposite of what was done to us. As I was thinking about that, I couldn't really commit to one side or the other. There are lots of things I think my parents did well, and there are other things that...well, suffice it to say, could have been handled a hell of a lot better. I'm sure I will make many mistakes on this parenting journey as well, but I want to try and minimize that as much as possible (thus the continual reading).

Bottom line points from this section are as follows:

Struggle is good for kids. Do not do everything for your child. Let them fall and pick themselves up (both literally and figuratively). And for God's sake, DO NOT LET YOUR KID RUN THE SHOW. Parents are in charge, yet these days, that's barely noticeable. Some of the kids I know seem to give their parents the orders - instead of the other way around.

I think the most applicable information to me at the moment was to really work at teaching Mo the meaning of delayed gratification. In other words, instead of rushing to meet her needs the moment she starts to fuss and cry, I should give it 5 to 10 minutes so that she learns that waiting is not the end of the world. This is tough to do at times when she's really screaming her little head off, but I'm sure going to try and be consistent. (Note to self: Must stay cheerful when finally tending to her...can't let the screaming get to me...) Anyway, it'll be interesting to see if this little experiment really has an effect on her since she tends to be very, very impatient about things. I'll keep you all posted!

Posted by monkeygirl at January 17, 2005 09:58 PM

Comments

I have gotten better at this, particularly being so pregnant and needing a few extra minutes. One thing I see is that he often goes back to sleep, even in a nap. I do try to soothe him when he falls, but not in a way that will turn him into a showboat faller, but in an Uh-oh YOUR OK way!

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